Did He Know?
Well I sure knew, but did he?
You always see the funny sitcom skit hubby mistakenly forgets big day, you know a birthday or anniversary and he tries to either be sly think of something quick or has to make up for it BIG time. Well that’s not how my special days play out.
So what makes these dates so special to us women? Well naturally they symbolize that we stood the test of time. It’s also a time to reflect on the memories we’ve made and built. For our birthday’s it’s another year that bit the dust creeping into old age like a stealth burglar about to rob the bank of our youth.
But the anniversary is quite different it’s supposed to be a joyous triumphant day that you get to actually share with somebody you love. You can look in the face of statistics and laugh hardily because you know that while the odds are stacked against you, it’s ok you managed to push back with this other person and together the two of you get to celebrate another year together.
But what do I know about anniversaries? I mean really…with my first husband by our third anniversary he was already knee deep in nonmonogamy, according to the phone records I later pondered over; I think their conversation lasted a good 40 minutes after I went to bed that night.
The second marriage never even saw the light of the first anniversary, I believe we were already trying to sign papers to the fact that we couldn’t wait to be as far away from one another as possible at that point.
And well this my third times a charm hubby, this third anniversary just sort of flittered away. I had a day of reflection and prayer along with an eye doctors appointment, I’m really not sure why I agreed to have them dilate my eyes either because the next couple hours that day seemed extremely fuzzy and trying to function this way with the toddlers was interesting to say the least. But since I won’t have insurance when the divorce is final I better make sure I’m in tip top health now, right?
So I did take a minute to read our vows, they were so thoughtful and sweet his dad wrote them just for us. He even stood in as our minister so to speak and married us. I cherished them so much in my traditionalistic approach to gift giving on our first year the “year of paper” I created a piece and had it mounted in a frame. I guess it should’ve been a sign when during our move this was another item that was treated with little care and ended up shattered and broken.
So the third is the “year of leather” if I had gotten him a gift this year, what might it have possibly been? If I still liked the person he was it may have been something cheesy like a leather watch to symbolize the fact that we were in fact standing the test of time. Although I think now I’d probably get him something more along the lines of this old relic of a mask worn by doctors during the times of the plague. Originally I was looking for ancient medical contraptions that may not be the most comfortable but this, this reminds me of Pinocchio the lying little boy who could not tell the truth and his nose grew too big. It seems to fit perfectly reflecting the shell of a distorted man consumed by something evil and unworldly.
Well I got no card or call on this our third anniversary but a couple days earlier he did receive a package in our mailbox, my mailbox, I’m sure it wasn’t intended for me though and more to “King Size Enhance” his relationship with his new girlfriend, maybe that’s why I was in such an ill mood most of last weekend. I guess I should be thankful that those problems are no longer my problems, especially this new problem!
So now a couple days after the fact I’m feeling a little better, a little more stable, more at peace, more accepting so I guess it’s true time is a miraculous thing it can heal you, it does fly, it is precious, so don’t waste it worrying because you’ll never get it back…alright sometimes easier said than done.